An update on Patrick

or is it Patricia?

Well, we still don't know. We ended up going to the hospital last night after my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart, lasting 55 seconds for over an hour. I thought for sure "THIS IS IT" and was so afraid of delivering the baby at home that we got out of bed and headed to the hospital around 1:45. After checking me thoroughly (and by thoroughly I mean very painfully...when my mid-wife checks me it doesn't hurt at all but it felt like the nurse was trying to check to see if I had strep throat via my cervix), we discovered I was still only dilated to a 1. I was one of those women that was so convinced I was at least a 3. Nope. Just a 1. The good news is I'm 80% effaced and the baby has dropped to a -2, which is better than where I was at my mid-wife appointment last Tuesday.

After walking the hallways of Labour & Delivery and then Postpartum for almost an hour, she roughed me up again and discovered no progress had been made. So she called my mid-wife who gave me 2 options:

1. Go home

2. Get a shot of morphine and go home

I chose option #2. The pain of the morphine shot (my first ever) was totally worth it, slurred words and all. We got home around 4:30 and I slept until the phone rang around 9:00 and then drifted in and out of consciousness until 12:30.

So now my contractions are 45-50 seconds long every 10 minutes. Some of you experienced this for days before your child finally came along and if I have to endure this for more than a day, well, I'll probably go crazy. CRAZY I SAY. And the hospital said I cannot come back unless my contractions are 60 seconds long, 2-3 minutes apart for an hour and so painful that they are unbearable. Can't wait for that!

By the way, Avatar was amazing. Pat either really enjoyed it or hated all the noise because s/he moved so much the entire 3 hours. But we certainly enjoyed every minute of it and recommend seeing it in 3D in the theatre. I just don't think you'd get the same experience watching it at home, no matter how large of screen you have.

I'll update you if anything changes. In the meantime, I'm hanging around the house going crazy (but at least my suitcase is now packed for the hospital!).

S/he'll be comin' round the mountain when s/he comes

For some reason this song is in my head these days. I guess it's because I really feel like Pat is coming sooner than later. I've had a lot of activity "down there" in the last 36 hours or so, starting with contractions at 12:30 a.m. on Boxing Day (12/26). They lasted less than an hour so I just rode them out. Funny, I thought I'd been having contractions for the last week but once you have an actual contraction, you realize quickly that those haven't been contractions--they were more like cramps. BIG difference.

Then last night I woke up at 2:00 a.m. not feeling quite right and realized I was having more. They lasted until this morning but again, the duration and frequency haven't been cause for concern. What has been cause for concern is the blood. Sorry to be graphic but at 2:00 a.m. I discovered blood and called the hospital where I'm due to deliver. I explained everything to the nurse and she told me that if it got heavier or if Pat stopped moving or if my contractions got stronger and longer, then I needed to come in. But none of those things have happened. Pat is moving around just as much as normal. The blood flow is the same and the contractions have eased off. I do feel like Pat has dropped a little though as I'm starting to feel uncomfortable and walking isn't as easy as it was when I got up this morning.

So we're going to go see Avatar in 3-D this afternoon and then come home and make pizzas. I'm guessing Pat will hold off on making it's appearance anytime in the next 24 hours, giving us enough time to get that suitcase packed for the hospital and all of the other little nitpicky things we need to do.

We'll keep you posted.

A paradigm shift

As recently as 2 weeks ago, I had strangers coming up to me telling me I was the cutest pregnant woman ever. Trust me, I have loved comments like this. I am the baby of the family and have always loved the limelight so all the attention I've been getting the last few months has been wonderful. There's nothing wrong in admitting that, is there? And when Pat is born, all of the attention shifts from me to Pat, so I've been trying to store up all of the kind words and attention because pretty soon I will play second fiddle to someone who will be far cuter than I ever was.

I don't know what's happened in the last 2 weeks but now I have strangers approach me EVERY day saying things like "You look like you're about to pop!" or "Your due date must be soon!!" I just smile and say "Yep, pretty soon" but what I really want to do is shove them into a display of some sort, or kick them in the shin, or say something nasty like "And when are you due?". I like attention, but when you're implying that I'm of Shrek proportions, I'm not so cool with the attention then. And I really don't think I'm that big. I mean, I'm 39 weeks along but at my mid-wife appointment this morning I was measuring at 36 weeks. But clearly I must be ENORMOUS since everyone keeps telling me I am.

Everything is good with Pat. Heart rate was 146 as Pat was moving around a lot. Dilated to 1 cm, still 50% effaced. Pat hasn't dropped yet and my mid-wife said a lot can happen in a week, but if Pat doesn't drop within 2 weeks (1 week past my due date) then I will probably have to have a C-section. She didn't say it to worry me but to prepare me just in case. That is the last thing I want, so if you're looking for me, I'll be out walking, trying to get gravity to force Pat down where s/he needs to be.

Well, my friend is on her way over to help me put up all the artwork in the nursery and finally be finished with Pat's room. Photos posted soon.

Mommy, why does everyone call me Pat?

We were talking the other night and it came up that some of you who call our fetus "Pat" might be tempted to call the baby Pat when it arrives. And just so you know, you have full permission to, although we think the names we've chosen are a little better than Pat. But we wonder if little Rachel or Cohen will ask us in a few years why everyone keeps calling them Pat. We'll just shrug our shoulders and say "Maybe they have you confused with another goofy 4 year old."

Anytime Pat. Anytime!

Just a quick update for those of you wondering how little Pat is doing.

Pat still hasn't dropped, as evidenced by my 3:00 a.m. to 5:00 a.m. heartburn attack. Pat woke me up with a lot of movement and I realized my throat was on fire. I went upstairs (remember, I'm sleeping in the basement like a dog) and took my heartburn pill and went back down to sleep. Well, the burn was so bad that I couldn't lie down. So I sat up reading until 5:00, waiting for the burn to subside so I could get some rest. I can't wait for Pat to drop to ease the burn. I know this will bring a bunch of new issues (like the waddle) but I really can't wait to be done with heartburn 24-7. I really don't know how my husband lives with heartburn every day of his life. I would jump off a roof if I had to deal with this forever. The benefit of these 3 or 4 a.m. wake-ups is it's getting me ready to not sleep very much. I'm so glad I'm not going from getting 8-10 hours/night to zero, but have had a few months of transition. I now get between 5 and 6, which I think is more realistic for when the baby arrives (right?).

Last night we videotaped Pat moving around. We were watching Saturday Night Live and Pat was busy wrapping gifts or making cookies or something that required a lot of movement so I put the remote control on my belly. It was dancing around and Christian and I were laughing so hard at it. We'll see if we can edit it down and put it on here.

We also got the car seat ready and in the Subaru yesterday, with the help of our friend Greg who has 2 kids. We could not have done it without him. Well, we probably could have but it would have taken us most of the day and a lot of frustration and name calling. Today I am putting the final things in the nursery, like the humidifier, the breast pump, diaper bag, etc. We're also getting my suitcase packed for the hospital, just in case.

We've had yet another busy week of dinners, lunches, getting together with friends, and a lot of running around. Got to take advantage of it while we can.

Here's another one of the hilarious fridge magnets we have. Darn it! We were planning on picking up one of the panhandlers and have them look after the baby in exchange for some loose change and a granola bar.

And one final shot of my friend (and former roommate) Brandi. We went over to her house for dinner last night and had a lovely time with Brandi, her husband Edward and their gorgeous daughter Zoe.

Probably not going to have the New Year's baby

At my 38 week appointment this morning, I found out I'm still not dilated. 50% effaced though, so there's that. Pat still hasn't "dropped", which means my heartburn continues. I thought that drinking copious amounts of eggnog would help put out the fire but it only helped on the scale. My mid-wife said if she could predict an arrival date, she said the first week of January, BUT, she also said things could happen so quickly that I could deliver this weekend (but she's hedging her bets on January). I'm still REALLY okay with not giving birth anytime soon. I still need to buy a nursing bras or two and some other necessities, and once I get my family's Christmas gifts shipped this afternoon, I'll be able to start getting those things done.

The crib bedding is done and in the crib and I love it! I think Pat will love it too. The nursery will be pulled together next week when my friend comes over to help me hang the artwork.

We have big plans this weekend. Getting the car seat in the car. I'm sure that will be loads of fun.

For your viewing pleasure, a photo of Pat's parents taken last weekend at my book club Christmas party. I have THE best book club in the world and had a wonderful time with them (and their significant others) for one last hurrah before I probably won't see them for a couple of months. It's so weird to think that the next time we're all together I will be a mother. I think that every time I hang out with people and start to freak myself out.

Ma & Pa Hancock

THE best book club minus Val (who just had a baby herself). Everyone looks great in this photo except yours truly, who's staring off into the distance (or probably eyeballing some food). 

A letter of introduction

Oh, I hope you don't think that Pat has arrived (based on the title of this entry). Pat is still safe and secure in it's aquatic home inside my uterus. Hopefully Pat isn't going anywhere soon.

I wanted to share a gift I received from my mom at my Salt Lake City baby shower. She sent it down with my sister and when I read it, I got all teary-eyed, as did some of the women in attendance. Without further ado...

B is for boy which I might be.

A is for another possibility.

B is for blue, a colour I'll wear.

Y is for yelling - I'll do my share.

H is for Hancock, my last name, it's true.

A is for aunties, of which I have two.

N is for Nana, who loves me so.

C is for Christian - that's my dad, you know.

O is for oodles and oodles of love.

C is a creation of my Father above.

K is for Kristyn, my mommy so dear, who'll love me completely, year after year.

And so with these words, not just a few, I've introduced myself to you.

Good thing there's no "D" in "Hancock" because you can probably guess which word I would have begged her to include.

It's time to place your bets

I feel like I want to get in writing what I'm thinking Pat is and when Pat will arrive, just to see. A lot of people have baby pools but we aren't that organized. Instead, we'll have a Fantasy Football type of thing. We'll call it Fantasy Fetus, okay? It doesn't cost anything so you won't lose your shirt, and the odds are better than anything you could bet on in Vegas. So, if you want to participate, you need to make a comment on this blog with the following prediction:

1. Gender

2. Arrival Date

3. Arrival Time

4. Weight

Whomever comes closest will win accolades and bragging rights and I'll put a picture of them on the blog and write something really nice about them. If I had a sponsor I'd try and get them to kick in something, but sadly I don't.

So here's Kristyn's. Boy. January 6th. 3:42 p.m. 6lbs 11oz.

And here's Christian's. Girl. December 28th. 3:30 p.m. 6lbs 8 oz.

Your turn.

Here belly, belly, belly, belly, belly!

Okay, a couple of belly shots. They might not necessarily be mine!

Above is my Uncle Brian at his 65th birthday party. I think we might be due around the same time!! (Uncle Brian, if your kids show you this, well, I'm glad I live 3500 miles away and won't be coming home for Christmas)

Profile shot. SO festive with the tree in the background, eh? You've gotta love that nude belly panel. I like to push it down but it means my jeans always end up around my ankles when I'm out for my 7 mile jog each morning.

And finally, a shot I couldn't resist taking.

We heart Pat!  

The countdown continues

Well, I can't sleep. It's 12:17 a.m. and I'm still pretty wired. We had a delicious meal at our friend Misse's tonight, complete with stuffed mushrooms, cucumber salad, prosciutto wrapped chicken, corn (which I love) and cauliflower gratin. So very good. My appetite, which has been on the non-existent side as of late, came back in full force and I stuffed myself. Maybe that's why I can't sleep. Indigestion at it's finest.

We're having a busy week and the weekend is just as busy as we fill our evenings with non-nesting activities. We will have had plans every night but one this week. The husband can't seem to understand my need to be social right now, but it goes like this:

1. I truly heart my friends and love to be around them and don't know when the next opportunity to hang around with them will be.

2. It's a free meal and that means I don't have to plan for dinner or stand on my feet and make it. And my friends are very kind and let me sit there and not help with prep or clean-up. Score.

3. Ummm, I don't know if Christian doesn't realize this but our life is about to change and going out will not be as easy a task in, I don't know, 3-4 weeks.

So, if you need me, I've given up on the nesting and am taking advantage of this time to spend with the people I adore.

Here's tonight's fabulous chef. And doesn't it look like there's a halo around our heads? We're so angelic.

Last Sunday I did something an unemployed person should not do. I went to a trunk show for a Park City designer who only creates super cute kids clothes. Wasn't planning on buying anything because I'm wanting to buy clothes that are not yellow or green. Ended up drooling over these and bought them without giving it a second thought.

I just couldn't resist. Little bicycles for our little bicyclist (at least Pat had better love biking as much as Mum & Dad do). And hey, there isn't a hint of yellow or green to be seen.

A couple of weeks ago I received a care package from a friend who gave birth earlier this year. In it were magazines, apology cards to use when we take the baby some place and it's a nightmare experience, and some funny things like this fridge magnet:

Thank you Loren. These magnets make me HOWL every time, especially this one.

Okay, it's 12:42 and my Julia Child book is beckoning me to come hither. Belly shot posted on Friday. I pinky swear.

Damn you, Swine Flu!

Well, last night at our birthing class we were informed that the hospital where we are delivering has a very strict policy in place due to the stupid H1N1 virus. We are only allowed 2 people in the room while we deliver Pat. I really wanted to have a party, complete with champagne and hors d'oeuvres of course, with Christian, my mom, my sister, my friend Tara, and possibly my friend Brandi whom I had asked to take photos of the entire birth because she has mad photography skills. That's not going to happen now. As I'm typing this I'm periodically shaking my fist in the air to show H1N1 how I feel about it. Oh, AND, the 2 people I do allow in the room have to have both the H1N1 and seasonal flu shots and need to show proof. I thought this was the birthing class instructor just being overly cautious so I checked with my mid-wife at my 37 week appointment this morning and she said they are that strict. But she's going to try and sneak my sister in the room so she can be there. I'm ordering a nurses costume (one of those sexy halloween costumes) online for my sister to wear so she looks like she "fits in" and no one questions her as to why she's there. Or I'll buy that invisible serum I've been wanting to try out. Whichever one is cheaper.

So I'm not dilated at all, which I'm fine with. Like I've said, I'm not ready to give birth yet. I don't even have a nursing bra and I haven't had a pedicure either! Priorities!!! I've lost 2 lbs and am measuring 2 weeks earlier/smaller than I am. Heart rate was 132. Pat was incredibly active for most of the appointment. I think it's whittling some Christmas gifts right now. S/he is still head down but hasn't dropped into my pelvis yet, so the heartburn continues. The good news is my mid-wife said I could double the ranitidine since 150mg isn't doing the trick. 

I will take a bare belly photo tomorrow and post it so you can see it in all it's glory. Maybe I'll pose in front of the Christmas tree for a more festive feel to the photo. Maybe.

Sleeping with the enemy

I think that's how my husband has been viewing me lately--the enemy of his sleep. I'm not getting up in the night to go to the bathroom. I'm getting up to down a bottle of Tums. And I'm also tossing and turning so much because Pat has turned my uterus into a bowling alley or something equally raucous and I can't find that sweet spot. You know the spot where your body is angled in just the perfect way in the perfect place on the mattress and you can't help but fall fast asleep because everything is so perfect?

So, because of that, we're sleeping on 2 different levels of the house. He's in the marital bed (how old fashioned does that sound?) and I'm in the basement, like a dog. Actually, I'm in the more comfortable bed in the bedroom that doesn't have any windows. We call it the cave. And I do sleep a lot better, as does he. He for obvious reasons. Me because I don't feel guilty over keeping him awake AND because I'm now eating a bowl of Tums before bed (except I forgot to last night). It's working out really well.

Now we just need to work out a conjugal visit schedule. (did I really just type that and not delete it?)

Get me outta here!

That's what I think Pat is saying, if Pat could talk. There's a lot of activity "down there" and I think the way I described it to my sister was probably best. It's like a prisoner trying to dig his way out of his cell with a spoon. There's a desperation to the activity, at least, that's how it feels. There's a constant fluttering of activity as Pat's hands are poking and prodding and tinkering (just a couple of minutes ago I swore Pat was knitting a scarf in there). So I had a chat with Pat this morning while we were lying in bed. I informed dear Pat that I'm not ready for my life to change just yet and the nursery isn't 100% done, although it's probably 85% there, so Pat cannot come anytime before Christmas. We'll see if Pat listened because s/he has been kicking and shifting around a lot all morning. Pat is such a tease.

Hey, has anyone else tried to put lights on a Christmas tree while being 9 months pregnant? I've come up with a word to describe it: FRUSTERTAINING because it's a little entertaining and a whole bunch frustrating.

My brush with fame

My friend Juli works in the film industry in Toronto and has brushes with fame all the time. As does my friend Kirsten who lives in Park City, UT and frequently finds herself dining beside the likes of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick. Living in Salt Lake City, I don't have too many star sightings, well, except during the Sundance Film Festival. Whenever I do see or meet a star, I kind of lose all composure and probably look like an insane person. Although I do feel like I held it together pretty well when I met the hottest man in the world (aside from Christian), David Beckham. But last night I went back to my old ways and probably scared this "star."

The person I'm referring to is Heather B. Armstrong, a name many of you will not recognize. But if you are a loyal reader of dooce.com, her daily blog, you will immediately know who I'm talking about. She lives here in good ol' SLC and my friend Marci informed me yesterday that she was doing a book signing at a book shop not too far away. I hadn't read Dooce's blog yesterday or the day before so I didn't know, but when Marci told me, I thought I should go and meet her. I should include a disclaimer for some of you. If you live in the Bible Belt or are very sensitive to naughty words and discussions about things a lot of people consider private, then don't check out her blog. But if you are like me and think there is no subject that is off-limits for discussing, then check it out. Anyway, back to meeting Dooce.

Christian came into the store with me but it was so crowded he immediately left and waited in the car. So I stood in line by myself and kept peeking around people to see her. She kept looking up and smiling at me, but it was more of an "okay, I can spot a weirdo in a crowd and apparently I've got one coming up any minute now" smile, like she sort of feared for her life. I think I had the stalker look to me. When it was my turn, she politely asked me when I'm due and we had a lovely chat about Pat and Pat's due date and the consumption of alcohol during pregnancy. She told me her thoughts on it and made me promise I wouldn't publish them so I can't, but let's just say I had a glass of wine after talking with her last night. She's really funny in person, just like how she writes. And she'd been drinking a lot of wine so her southern accent kept coming out. And her eyes were REALLY dilated, so not sure if she was on anything else, but regardless, she was really friendly and I sort of have a girl crush on her now.

Here she is writing in my friend Marci's copy of one of her books (oh, I failed to mention above she's written a couple of books).

And here we are. Best Friends Forever! She's really tall. So is her husband. Their daughters are going to be HUGE! It kind of looks like she's cupping my huge boobs, doesn't it?

So I try to get people to do the Charlie's Angels pose with me whenever possible and I actually got her to do it. Her husband got some of us doing it too so maybe I'll make an appearance on her website, or book cover, or calendar. A girl can dream. 

And here's what she wrote in the book I had her sign. "Ya'll are gonna have fun!". So very true.

Week 36! The girls in my mothers group told me this morning that I'm going to get bigger in the next 4 weeks. I really hadn't planned for that. No really, I hadn't. I thought this was the biggest I was going to get.  But hey, the bigger my stomach gets the smaller my butt looks (at least to Christian and me).

Here's one dead on. Didn't feel like including my goofy face.

And finally, a shot of one of the pins my friend Beckie gave me at the shower. REFRESHING NEW BABY SMELL. Can't wait!

Our little Crenshaw melon (a what?)

"Your baby is gaining about an ounce a day. She now weighs almost 6 pounds (like a crenshaw melon) and is more than 18 1/2 inches long. She's shedding most of the downy hair that covered her body, as well as the vernix caseosa, the waxy substance that protected her skin during her nine-month amniotic bath. Next week, your baby will be considered full-term. Most likely she's in a head-down position, but if she isn't, your practitioner may suggest scheduling an external cephalic version, where she'll try to turn your baby by manipulating her from the outside of your belly."

This is what Baby Center sent me this morning for my weekly update. I don't know what a crenshaw melon is but I don't think I'd like it as I'm not a big melon fan (melon is a waste of time for me). I was a little disappointed to learn that Pat is shedding it's waxy and furry covering because I do prefer my babies all waxy and hairy. A sticky primate comes to mind.

Fortunately for Pat and me, Pat assumed head-down position several weeks ago, so unless Pat changes his/her mind, no external cephalic version will be necessary, which is good because I hear that is a VERY painful procedure for most women.

I was supposed to have my 36 week appointment this morning but the nurse called to say my mid-wife was delivering a baby this morning and had to reschedule for tomorrow morning, provided the baby comes within 24 hours. I hope for that mother-to-be the baby comes before then.

I still have a lot of energy right now. I keep waiting for the exhaustion to hit but so far so good. I actually have more energy right now than at any point in the pregnancy. So I'm taking advantage of it and getting loads of stuff done. I won't bore you with my to-do list for today but I think I'll be oot and aboot for most of the day.

Well, 28 days (give or take a few) to go until we meet the popular and charming Pat. 36 week photo posting tomorrow.

Who do you know quit her job today?

I've accepted a new position that will work better with my schedule. The pay isn't great and I have to work 7 days a week, but I think being a housewife (for the next 4 weeks) and then a mother will be more rewarding than the job I just quit today.

Truth be told, my job sucked. As I've mentioned before, it's 100% commission and selling advertising at a university in this economy is a foolish and frustrating endeavor. Yesterday I was at work looking at my quotas for this month and the next 4 months and realized there was absolutely no way I could even come close to getting 1/2 of my quota. And then I figured out how much my take home pay would be with said performance. Peanuts! So I talked to a couple of friends last night and then talked to Christian while we (okay, he) assembled the bookcase and even before I had the entire sentence out of my mouth, he said "Quit and do it tomorrow", so that's what I did. We both figured that the energy I would expend and the stress I would accumulate over the next 4 weeks wouldn't be worth the small paycheck, so I informed my boss around 9:30 this morning that I was"done" and I left a few hours later after I sent some e-mails and emptied out my cubicle. Didn't burn any bridges and left on a high note. And can I tell you how AMAZING I feel? This heavy burden that has been resting on my shoulders for so long is gone. I can tell Pat is excited because he/she has not stopped moving at all today. And I'm not exaggerating.

So now I can spend the next 4 weeks nesting 24 hours/day, not just between the hours of 5:00 pm and 10:00 pm. And Christian is excited because I have promised to do his laundry now...well, at least until Pat's birth (for those of you that don't know, I have never done Christian's laundry in the 6.5 years we've been married. Some of you shake your head and frown upon this arrangement whilst others can't believe I've been so lucky).

We're both a little nervous about the lost income, but again, it was going to be peanuts anyway. I think we'll be able to trim some fat off our monthly spending since we won't be going to our place in the Hamptons every weekend and I won't be driving the Hummer around all over town. And I'm so very much looking forward to enjoying the next 4 weeks and then being a new mom, and not having to worry about a missed quota and possible termination.

So, if you need me for anything except manual labour, let me know. I've got some time on my hands right now.