Doctor vs. Midwife

When we first discovered we were pregnant, I (K) started to think about who we wanted to see for the pre-natal care and delivery of our child. The obvious choice for a lot of women is their Ob-Gyn. I really started thinking about this because I had seen my Ob-Gyn for infertility and wasn't impressed with his approach or handling of our situation. So I started to ask around and one friend that I trust greatly (who's baby was delivered by our shared Ob-Gyn) said that the next time she would go to a midwife because it seemed like our doc didn't really have much time to spend with her at each appointment and she didn't receive the care she had expected. Then I started hearing from other people that they had seen a midwife and loved the entire experience. I had always thought that only patchoulie-wearing hippies that wanted to deliver in a kiddie pool in their living room used a midwife. I was sorely mistaken.

Turns out these professionals take a very different approach to pre-natal care and delivery than most doctors, which was atractive to me. They have a MUCH lower rate of Caesarean Section, which is great because I DO NOT want a C-section. They spend more time with you at each appointment. They are with you for almost your entire labour, unlike a lot of doctors that arrive just in time to catch the baby. They don't try to push home births or drug-free (natural as some people call it) labour either. And our midwife hugs us at each appointment, which is something I never would have received from my doctor. When people ask me what a midwife does I inform them that they do everything a doctor does but in a more nurturing and involved way. Please don't think that I believe all doctors to be evil. I don't at all, especially considering I have so many friends that are docs. I just think that our society has distanced itself from how childbirth should be and actually used to be pre-1940s when it became so institutionalized.

After asking around, I received the name of a midwife who was very much trusted and of course recommended and I promptly scheduled my first appointment with her to check her out. I came armed with my list of questions,  as most first-timers do. Needless to say, she passed my test and I scheduled my next appointment with her. I think I was most impressed because she said that all of the off limit things that other friends have been told to avoid were cool with her, in moderation of course. Most importantly, she said I could keep mountain biking. Yay! (just so you know, this past Sunday was my last mountain bike ride for the year. I realized I'm pretty far along and if I crashed, which I don't do anymore, but if I did, I'd probably damage poor Pat. So C is putting slicks on for me and I will continue riding pavement from here on out).  

I'm currently reading this absolutely fascinating book called "Birth Day" by Mark Sloan, MD. The blurb on the front cover says, "A Pediatrician Explores the Science, the History, and the Wonder of Childbirth." I read from it every night and look forward to seeing what I'll learn from it every day. It's just so interesting. Last night I learned that the term "midwife" is a Middle English term, nearly a thousand years old. It's a combination of the words "mid" (with) and "wyf" (woman): a midwife was literally a person who stayed with a woman during her labour. The chapter goes on to describe how, since the dawn of humanity, women have always been involved in birthing other women's children. It was a group effort as childbirth was a strong common denominator for women everywhere. "When doctor-assisted hospital birth beckoned in the early twentieth century, with its promise of increased survival and decreased pain, women abandoned the ways of their mothers and grandmothers. By mid-century the transition was complete. Home birth was an unlamented thing of the distant, dusty past, a relic of pioneer times."

So....all this jabbering to say, I have realized I want more personal care and a more nurturing environment in which to bring Pat into this world and I believe that I have found that in my midwife. I almost want to get back to basics, so to say. Try to fuse the past with current practices. Does that mean I want a room full of people at Pat's birth? Possibly. I do like a good party. And does that mean I don't want any of the wonderful drugs that are at my disposal? I'm not sure. That's something I'm currently working through. Just don't go sniffing around for patchoulie oil on me--you're not going to find it.